Why hire a doula?
There were a couple of other things women had going for them before modern medicine: connection to their bodies and more resilience in the face of the unknown.
The more our society prioritizes science and information and moves away from nature as sacred and reverential for our survival, the less connected we’ve become to the things that make us nature: our bodies, for one.
We have learned to look towards external sources for validation and expertise and safety, instead of developing the skill of listening inward for answers and direction. We’ve lost trust in the animal and wilderness of our bodies: that we know how to birth in the same way that we know how to yawn, laugh, cry, see, smell, sneeze, love, pee and poop (giggle now but once you have kids, this word will be a regular in your vocabulary).
Our bodies have deep knowing that we, as a species, are from nature — just as the tree knows how to grow, you also know how to do the things that your body was designed to do. This is true of functionality (like sneezing and smiling, as I mentioned) but also true of a deeper conversation that your body is trying to have with you — in telling you who you are and what you stand for. With awareness and deep listening, we can come deeper into who we are as individuals and live from the center of our beings. We can learn to trust that we do have the answers. This brings alignment and softens anxiety, stress, and friction.
Part of my work as a doula is to help you tap into or deepen that core listening, to help you unearth your inner knowing and empower you to trust your body — a skill that will serve you in birth, in making decisions as a new parent (or a parent again) and for the rest of your life.
Rooting into yourself opens up a new freedom for birth — intentionality vs a prescriptive plan. Grounding into values and goals, instead of specifics, will widen your ability to handle unexpected turns. This will make you more resilient, more ready to handle whatever comes, and less likely to experience trauma created by the chasm between reality and expectation. We don’t know how your birth will go, and part of my work is to help you widen your expectations so we can hold the unknown with openness and a welcoming, instead of fear.
Once we’ve deepened your embodied experience, and you are in labor (however you get there), we can co-collaborate with birth itself. I know that sounds mystical — and it is — but it’s true. We can meet birth based on what it asks of us, instead of placing our own mandates and protocols onto birth, by listening to your body. It knows what it needs. And we can dampen the external noise to amplify your body’s voice.
We can employ age-old knowing to down-regulate your nervous system by creating a dimly-lit, calm, safe environment. We can employ patience as every birth happens on its own time. We can advocate for what matters to you, while prioritizing you and your baby’s safety. We can work with your support team to slow the process and truly investigate if every suggestion is necessary.
All of this creates more flow, an easefulness, a hand of support to meet and uphold the more challenging moments. This does not mean you will be without pain (unless that is the path you prefer via medication) or difficulty, but it means we are aware that pain is working to move our baby out — it is proactive; it is actually supportive. We (including any other support team members you want me to empower) will work with your pain through breathwork, bodywork, positioning, visualization, and staying low and open. We’ll also use affirmational words of encouragement and trust in you.
We trust your body.
“Our bodies have deep knowing that we, as a species, are from nature — just as the tree knows how to grow, you also know how to do the things that your body was designed to do. But sometimes we need a little support to remember and trust.”
— Ali Carr, Wild Grace